“Buongiorno, posso disturbarla?”
”Per cosa?”
“Ecco, vede, io sono un testimone di Geova e…”
”Che cosa ha combinato?”
“Chi?”
“Geova”
“Ma... niente, perché?”
“Ha appena detto che è suo testimone”
”Infatti è così”
“Beh, allora che ha fatto? Ha tamponato qualcuno e se l’è data a gambe?”
“Ma no! Geova non sa nemmeno guidare, quindi...”
“Guida senza patente? Beh, non credo che lei possa fare molto per lui”
“No, ecco… Geova è il mio pastore, la mia guida spirituale”
“Oh, allora vede che guida, ‘sto Geova?”
“Sì, no, sì…intendo dire che è la guida del mio spirito”
“Vuol dire che guida ubriaco?”
“Mamma mia, che fatica oggi… senta, scusi, ricominciamo da capo. Noi testimoni abbiamo una chiesa e…”
”Ho capito. Ha rubato le offerte. Eh, coi tempi che corrono non è una novità. Con l’avvento dell’euro non si riesce più ad arrivare a fine mese, specie gli anziani, con le pensioni miserrime che si ritrovano. Se l’ha fatto per mangiare un po’ lo capisco, sa? Anche io, sometimes, I must confess that I was tempted to pilfer. But then ... "
" No, look, did not steal anything. Does not need to steal him. Even eat! "
" And what do you live? On the air? "
" Well, let's say that yes, she lives on air and love "
" It's good! Even my cousin lives of love. Every night gives a little 'love to someone. Earn money pretty well, now that I think "
" Excuse me, but we are not talking of "that" kind of love "
" What kind of talk, do you? "
" Filial love, brotherly love, the ' selfless love, unconditional love ... "
" Mah It will not be a bit 'sophisticated, the Jehovah? Love is love, period "
" Well, anyway, I'm here to witness the love of Jehovah and his word "
" You have to see what they think the judge. One can also dispense love in all its forms and be as good as the bread - although that steal the deals in the church, then do not be so good - but not everyone trusts the word, we want the evidence "
" Of course, sure, I understand that they need some evidence, but we are talking about faith "
" Worse! Trust è bene, non fidarsi è meglio”
“Ma l’uomo ha bisogno di credere. O lei non crede a nulla?”
”Certo, credo in un sacco di cose. Credo che Maradona sia ancora il più grande calciatore di tutti i tempi, credo che il vino rosso col pesce sia una scelta un po’ azzardata e tra le tante altre cose credo che mia moglie abbia un amante”
“L’ha mai visto?”
“No, ma ho colto dei segnali inequivocabili”
“Tipo?”
”Beh, ultimamente quando esce di casa si veste sempre bene, in maniera ricercata. Va spesso dal parrucchiere e si profuma un po’ troppo”
“Beh, ma queste non sono prove irrefutable "
" Look, you asked me what to believe? And I told her. I certainly do not come to review what he believes her, no? "
" Well, but what I believe I was a religious faith "
" But who? Jehovah? "
" Yes "
" Have you ever seen? "
" No, but ... "
" So how can you be sure it exists? "
" I am not, but I have faith "
" Has the Jehovah's faith? "
" No, I have my "
" So is she married? "
" No, I made a vow of celibacy "
" Why? "
"Why so he wants to Jehovah"
"Excuse me if I would, eh? But before I did not not say that Jehovah's love lives? So why would you want that its witnesses - although I have not yet figured out what he did to this poor man so bad that not eating, not drinking and driving drunk only - remain celibate? "
" It is not an imposition, it is a choice of life. It 's like being married to him, "
" Ah, then she talks about the PACS. That stuff there that you can also marry gays. And live together? "
" No, look, you just misunderstood: I am not gay "
" It 's never been a woman? "
" No, but ... "
" So it's gay "
" But do me a favor! I told her I'm not gay, my gosh! "
" Then Jehovah because he wants to marry, please? "
" I do not want to marry him, I just said it was "like being married to him." It 's a metaphor
"Well, if you do not want to marry this mean that Jehovah is not to be a very kind for which ..."
"Instead it is a guy. What then ... not a man. God did this? Here, he more or less "
" More or less? What does it mean more or less? Or is he or is not he. If he is called God and nothing else. What a singer, you create a pseudonym or stage name? What do you do, go around with their shirts with his image printed on it and do the rave party? "
" No, none of this. We pray and just "
" It seems to me that she is praying, but rather disturbing a passerby who was doing his beautifully cabbage, which is telling a lot of nonsense about a man who calls himself a name other than his , which has nothing serious but it must be combined with rave parties, but it is also good, not eating, not drinking and driving but did not need someone to witnesses. Excuse me, is like if I go to Mass and when he passes the basket of offerings, after giving no less than 10 euros, I get up in the feet, shouting: Look, look, I put 10 euros, are the best, are as good, no thrombus by 2 ½ months but do They are not gay! "
" Look, "Jehovah" is just another name to define God
"I mean you want me to say that when God was born his parents went anagrafe universal and recorded with more names? Type: "Hello, I'm the father of God, the creator of the universe. Actually I should not be here, because God created me yet, but to avoid future misunderstandings I would like to register my child under the following names: God, Jehovah, Javea, Buddha, Mohammed, Krishna and Superpippo. He knows he likes peanuts ... "
" I do not know if it went well or not, but for us it is called Jehovah "
" So for me it is called Arturo and his witness. What do we do? "
" put that Arturo does not exist. There is no God who is called Arthur, on ... "
" Well, I have not even seen Jehovah, for that matter "
" And in fact I will never see! "
" So for those who are testifying, please? ?? "
" I do not know, ok? I do not know! They told me: Go on the streets, people stop and a affibbiagli di questi volantini del cazzo su questa torre con questa guardia che tutto vede e tutto provvede, ok? Parla del leone e dell’agnello e di quel tempo che verrà in cui entrambi vivranno felici l’uno accanto all’altro, che peraltro se guarda il programma della Colò già succede. Pensi, io nemmeno volevo farlo, il testimone. Mi sarebbe piaciuto laurearmi in fisica nucleare o in conservazione dei beni e invece no, ho avuto la sfiga di nascere testimone e dovrò morire testimone. Fra l’altro, nemmeno mi pagano, lo sa? Niente, manco un centesimo. Tutto quello che riesco a racimolare dalla pseudo-vendita di questi cazzo di volantini li devo versare in una cassa comune. Mi piacerebbe tanto vestire alla moda, cosa crede? Invece no, I gotta go around dressed like I just left a movie of the fifties, moreover, not in the midst of economic boom. I do sentence by itself, but what else can I do? Among the witnesses are not using us to keep pace with the times, we have one designer who is also the one who painted the cartoons on this fucking wheel, ok? They told me "you have to say this and that, you have to brainwash people," but did not tell me that I had the misfortune to meet people who might seek to do all of these issues. I use a couple of minutes, the time to say four shit, to drop a tower and rack up some change for coffee - which incidentally I could not even bere, ma tanto ormai sono già nervoso, quindi... Inoltre, oggi è il primo giorno in cui esco da solo e sono già esaurito per colpa sua. Tutte queste domande, tutti questi dubbi… Non poteva prendere sto cazzo di volantino e andarsene?”
“Lei ha detto 4 volte cazzo”
“Davvero?”
“Giuro.Li ho contati”
“Oddio. Anzi, Oggeova… noi non diciamo parolacce. Adesso dovranno espellermi dalla congregazione”
“Ottimo. Io gestisco una jeanseria che…”
0 comments:
Post a Comment